i revel in being an intern, learning to teach, at the Gazebo School at Esalen.

at this wonderful and revolutionary school, i witness such joy!  such miracles!  and i am learning lessons right along with the children (ages 2-5), lessons i might have learned when i was that age...

what a rich environment these children have --

• a lush rolling natural landscape, with trees and plants, sticks and stones, and a view of the wide expansive Pacific Ocean
• animals! -- a horse, a pig, goats, chickens, cats and a dog!
• a reasonable assortment of toys and tricycles and books and play clothing
• and of course their peers -- a wild assortment of children from varied backgrounds [including some from spanish-speaking families]

Working in the background: As a teaching intern, i have learned to intervene in their experience as little as possible [while of course always watching out for their safety].  Generally i am working in the background -- doing useful work, but putting a part of my attention on the children.  Often they will join me in whatever i'm doing.  For example, if i am fixing something, and they wish to help, then i welcome them, and get them the appropriate tools.  This slows me down a lot, but the focus is on the child's experience, not on my "efficiency".  There is one little boy in particular who simply *loves* tools -- whenever i start a project, he always runs up, saying "hamma!  hamma!" [which means "i want a hammer!  i want a hammer!"]  His joy in using the tools is infectious!

Facing emotions directly: One morning, a child's mother said goodbye and left, and the child burst into tears, and cried and cried.  I reflexively said: "Oh, we should have distracted the child, so that the mother could get away unnoticed."  I was shocked to hear the reply "No, it is better for the child to face the situation directly, and to experience the emotion."  And i realized how much more honest and healthy this approach is.  My "distraction trickery" would encourage the child to be ever vigilant, monitoring the mother's whereabouts in fear that she might slip away without warning.  In contrast, the honest direct approach allows the child to experience the situation, face it, understand it, and learn to deal with it.

Communicating directly: Many times, a child will turn to a teacher with a complaint like "Bobby took my toy" or "Sally is pushing me."  My natural impulse would be to intervene and impose a solution on Bobby or Sally.  Instead, i have learned to respond directly to the speaker, encouraging them to address the other child directly.  Typically i now say: "Well, is there something you want to say to Bobby?"  Eventually the children learn to speak directly to each other.  A frequent communication between children is: "No!"  It is very heartening to see behaviors change in favor of direct expression and greater self-reliance.  One little girl, when in a confrontation, used to cry plaintively while looking around for someone to rescue her; now she is beginning to defend herself and her "property" directly, by saying "No!" to other children.

Sending the same message on all channels: One day, one of the children took my glasses, which had been perched on top of my head.  I said "I don't want you to take my glasses.", but i said it laughingly, because i was enjoying the attention that the children were giving me.  They ignored what i said, and listened to the message conveyed by my attitude and tone of voice (which was "it's ok to take my glasses.").  Now, when i wish to get a message across, i have learned to send the same message on all channels:

• i say the words directly, e.g. "i don't want you to take my glasses."
• i look them in the eye.
• i use a calm serious tone of voice, conveying a steadfast intention.

Learning to speak: i have witnessed children greatly improve their verbal skills.  One two-year-old boy did not say a word during my first two months here.  Then one day, on my day off, i was walking by the park, and i said hello to all the children, and then goodbye; several of them said "hello" or shouted my name, and then several said "bye".  Then after i had turned to go, i heard this big loud "bye" with a voice i had never heard before -- it was that little boy!  i felt great surprise and joy.

i play simple impromptu verbal games with the children:

• when they say my name, i say their name. [repeat ad infinitum]
• when they say "Yes," i respond "Yes!" showing great joy; when they say "No," i respond "No?" showing great disappointment.  Back and forth we go between "Yes" and "No," with them leading the way. [repead ad infinitum]

Eye contact: i am just learning about this; i believe that it is very powerful and important.

I want to thank all my fellow teachers and interns, the children, the animals, the plants, the trees, the sticks, the stones, the ocean, and the universe for this glorious opportunity - this phenomenal treasure!   Thank you!!

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